Catching Up

Wow! Has it really already been almost a month since one of just wrote on here! Sorry to keep y'all waiting! We know you were sitting on the edge of your seat waiting right :) Well... where to start? How about Big Break?

Me, Anne, Ellen, Mandy, Bri and Jade in front of the stage.

Mallory, Me and Erica having some fun while playing catch phrase.

We buried Jake and Jon in the sand and then they struggled to get out.

Ellen, Erica and I playing lay exactly on. So much fun!

Big Break was a lot of fun! I made so many friends! I love being apart of Cru! It is so much fun! I had an interesting experience. I didn't get the pleasure to lead anyone to Christ this year, although many people did! God, was working more on me I think. He was showing me that I might just not be as strong as I thought I was. Through out the week I was feeling really disconnected from God, which is weird because during these kinds of things I usually am really close to Him. I started having doubts, I ignored them because I knew the answers to ward them off. That wasn't the smarted decision on my part. Thursday I got sick and didn't go out to share, but I forced myself to go to the last session. At the session we had an extended worship time to celebrate everything God had done that week. All of the sudden all my doubts came back, things like: "God doesn't love you. How could he? You are such a horrible person. Are you sure you are even saved? Who are to even have gone out and shared with those people? You don't deserve God." Those kinds of thoughts kept circulating through my head until I just stopped worshipping all together. I just didn't want to fake it anymore. If my heart wasn't in it, I wasn't going to act like it was. I confronted the doubts and lies in my head. I knew God loved me. I knew I was saved. I just felt so disconnected, like God was a million miles away and walking away. I can't explain it very well, I just felt lost and a lone. I realized later that night back in my room that I wasn't in love with God. I know that sounds like a romantic and weird thing to say about God, but we are supposed to love Him and be in love with Him and I wasn't there. I wasn't going out to the people on the beach because I loved them and wanted them to know God. I was going out to them because that is what I was supposed to do.

Don't worry, I am not in that state anymore. I have asked God to help me experience His love everyday and help me to love Him more everyday. I am definitely experiencing His love. I love Him now more than I ever have. He is doing really cool things everywhere I look. I praise Him for all those things.

Anyway, after that heavy stuff Kels and I have some exciting news! We signed our lease! We are living on S. Vanburen in IC! We are really excited. If you follow either of us on pinterest we apologize in advance for all the pins tagged at each other. If only pinterest had private boards, then you wouldn't have to see it all!

Here is a pic fo our apartment complex:

I think this is the back of one of the buildings? But you get the gist right?

A funny thing, at least to me it was funny, happened while Kelsey and I were running the other day. We were running along just hit the .17 mile mark and all of the sudden Kelsey wasn't running beside me anymore. She had fallen flat on her face. She skinned her knee (and her ego) pretty bad. Good thing her bf had bandages and ice ready when we got to his house because she was complaining pretty bad. It is all bruised and gross now. She limps very dramatically. First thing she will say when she sees you is, "My knee hurts." She will also continue to say this about every 5 minutes. You may want to avoid her as long as possible :)

Prayer for Kelsey:
~Her knee (obviously)
~Her roommate moved out and now she needs furniture! She is looking frantically! If you have any or know of anyone who has some they would like to get rid of, she would really appreciate it!

Prayer for Mary:
~Discipline. As the end of the school year approaches I feel as if I have seniorites all over again. It's bad. Also discipline in reading my Bible. I always let it go. It needs to be my number one priority.

Thanks for reading and praying! We love you all!

-MM-